How is it possible to be filled with so much excitement, and utter terror at the same time?
Happy for a change, yet so sad and scared...
I went to the last planning meeting at Clark's school today, and we have his official start date; MARCH 22nd.
I can't believe that in 3 weeks he is going to be starting school, all day school, coming and going on a bus and everything. I know being around the other kids is really going to help him, and I know he is going to love it. And I can't wait to see his school crafts, help out in his class room, and all that fun kind of school stuff. I am so so excited for him to start making friends!
(Or, at least that is what I am trying to remind myself over and over again.)
Even though I am excited for this new change, I can't help but be terrified at the same time, terrified and sad.
It's an end of an era.
So much is going to change, no more staying up late, and sleeping in late. No more fun picnic lunches, and swimming all afternoon. The lazy days are gone. No more cuddling on the couch watching our morning cartoons, all morning long. We are going to have to GET ON A SCHEDULE, yikes.
I am sad, I am going to miss him so much.
I feel so jealous of his teachers that are going to see and hear all the NEW first things he is going to say and do. I am worried about what will happen when he is sad... who is gonna hug and love him until he is better? What if he doesn't eat his lunch (he is so picky) and he is hungry all day? What if the kids are mean to him? What about his poor little blankies, that he is not going to be allowed to take to school...if that is not a sign of your baby growing up, I don't know what is (he loves his blankies, and takes them everywhere).
I never thought I was the type of Mom who would be so emotional over her child starting school... I used to long for these days, finally a little break for myself. To be fair, I did think I would have a couple more years to get ready for this day, we never really planned on him starting pre-school so young.
I am beginning to understand why some parents home-school their children now.
It is going to be so hard to let him go...
I am looking forward to the time Harry and I will get to spend together, brother free :) And I am pretty sure Harry is looking forward to that as well. I am also looking forward to less of Clark's messes and tantrums...I guess it will be a nice break from that kind of stuff. It will be fun to pick him up on early out days, and take him to the park. And our days off together will be so much more fun now. They are going to work on potty training him while he is at school, and that is definitely good news. So much to look forward to, more talking and learning, and growing.
I am excited, so excited...
just a little sad too.
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2 comments:
I promise you April you are going to love it! Yes you will cry that first day he is gone. I remember thinking that Gavin was going to have parts of his day I knew nothing about. Because up until that point he spent all his day with me. But after a week I realized how much I loved having him gone. Not because I didn't want to spend time with him. But because I constantly felt like I had to stimulate him and now, I got 3 hours off and someone else was doing it for me!
Clark is going to improve 10 fold with his speech and he's going to learn so much. Its going to improve his attitude and his temper. I promise you this because it did for Gavin. Also when you move and he goes to preschool next year in CA, it won't be all day. Its rare to find one that is. So just think of this as his "intense" therapy.
Also you will love the one on one time with Harry. Keaton and I bonded so much without Gavin around. I found it so much easier to get things done too. Like errands, cleaning, etc. And I only got 3 hours a day.
Oh and Clark is going to LOVE the bus! Its Gav's favorite. You are going to have so many cute crafts and he is going to learn so much. Its going to be awesome!
He's only three! Man thats young. I suppose its for the best all across the board for all concerned, But it just seems so young. Ray knows best on this stuff. Listen to her. I come from an era where pre-school barely existed. But dont feel bad about being emotional..he IS still a baby.
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