The One Where I Have A Nervous Breakdown

We are here, Norfolk, Virginia! 

After almost seven weeks, SIX THOUSAND miles, countless hotels and strange beds, we made it, all the way to Norfolk, and all in one piece.  What a trip of a life time!   I had so much fun seeing family and old friends, so much fun.  It was so nice to be able to get in the car everyday and decide where we wanted to go, and how we wanted to get there....there is so much freedom in that.  We traveled all the way from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic Ocean, and we have seen so much... let me just tell you we live in a beautiful country, beautiful.  We passed through nineteen states, a few I have never been to before (like Iowa, what a pleasant surprise that was) and I loved every minute of it.  There will be MANY more blogs to come about our travels and stops, I must have taken over 2,000 pictures and I want to share every one.

I feel so bad about getting so behind on my blog.  I never realized how cathartic it was to journal, and share our little life.  I missed it so much, and I look forward to catching up.

For now...

At the moment we are homeless, bouncing from hotel to hotel, looking for houses (no luck so far).  Jason reported to work today, met all the new people he will work with and got a rundown of his new responsibilities.  He seems very excited about his new station.  He works in downtown Norfolk, in an office building, right across from the big mall (he was very excited about this).  His new schedule seems relaxed (good for school), and he doesn't have to be on a duty rotation...which again he was VERY happy about.  They gave him the rest of the week off, to look for housing, which brings us to....

My nervous breakdown...

I don't remember moving ever being this stressful.  Like crying at the drop of a hat, screeching at my family, eating everything in sight, stressful.  I don't know if it is because we have a family now, if it is the area, or all the last minute changes, but I am having a hard time handling it all.  I feel paralyzed by all the stress and details.  I am very underwhelmed by our new area.  I just can't seem to find anything to like about it.  I know there is a lot to do here, and I keep telling myself sooner or later we will like it, BUT...  

Today was our first official day of looking.  No luck.  No call backs, unless it was to tell us the place was already rented.  I am having a hard time finding any housing, in our price range and in a decent neighborhood.  I am really trying not to have such a negative attitude, to put my faith in the Lord, that he where leads us where we need to go.
I just want to crawl under my covers and not come out until this is all over.

Tomorrow is a new day.
I will keep the faith.

Aloha 'Oe

Our last Sunday at church, Kahalu'u Ward, Hawaii.

June 6, 2010

 I loved the time we got to spend in the Kahalu'u ward.  

The people were so warm and inviting, and I loved the atmosphere of family and tradition.  I appreciated the time I spent serving in the nursery and the ladies I got to work with, they taught me so much about myself and being a Mom.  Jason and I have been through a lot of ups and downs, and I am so thankful for the righteous and dedicated home teachers we had, I will never forget Brother Faga and the kind spirit he brought into our home every month.  I am going to miss the big ward parties we used to have (with ALL the food) and the wonderful people we got to know.  It is so hard to say goodbye.

On our last Sunday at church on the island, as is tradition, the ward sang Aloha 'Oe to us.  The spirit is so strong and touching when I hear this song sung (in Hawaiian) and needless to say I had a million emotions and tears I was holding in that Sunday.  Once again I feel so blessed for the time we got to spend in Hawaii, and so thankful.

ps. Our house smelled like flowers for days, from all our leis... I think we counted 45. I love Hawaii!

I've Created A Monster

Clark and his (well actually my) Nintendo DS.

Someone needs an intervention.

It all started as a way to keep him still and quiet when we went to church, and out to dinner.

It was so nice to have him happy and occupied, so we could do what we needed to do.

Now, with all the traveling and changes it has turned into another security blanket.

He is so addicted.  He has to play all day, and all night.  

Last night he ignored all his aunties and uncles and his favorite little cousin, to play on the damned thing.

Needless to say, Mommy is putting her foot down.  I am refusing to re-charge it, and I have hidden all other electronic play things/toys... well until we are back on the road again.  And he is going to have to start earning his time to play.

Poor little Clark is going to have a hard day.

I have to admit it is kinda cute to watch him try to play and figure things out. 

His favorite is Mario...and I love to hear him say, in his little pretend Italian accent, "thatsa so niiiiice".

Jay's Promotion Ceremony

June 1, 2010

Jason and Capt. Vogh

Jason invited me and the boys to his work to watch his promotion ceremony.  I am so proud of him, and all the hard work he does.  And I am so happy that he seems to have finally found his stride in his career (yes, I said career, we will be CG lifers).  He knows what he wants to do, and he is excited about it.  

Way to go Jay!

(Sorry the pictures are so crappy.  I had to stand in the WAY back, fighting Harry, and trying to take pictures at the same time.)

(Again, bad picture I know, sorry.)

Giving him his first class pins.

On the left is Jason current Chief (well, until we left Hawaii) Dan Perkins.  And on the right is Tom Heimann, Jason's old Chief from when he was stationed on the CG Cutter Sherman.  By some weird chance Tom just happened to be vacationing in Hawaii the week of his promotion, and Jason invited him down.  Tom was/is such a good friend of ours, and Jason loved working for and with him.  I thought it was special that he was able to come participate.

After the various awards and what not, the honorees have a chance to stand up front for everyone to congratulate.  Naturally Clark thought he needed some praise and he took his place at the end of the line next to Jason.  I thought it was sweet that everyone played a long and shook his little hand.  Clark was so good that day, so very good.  I am proud of my little man too.

Tom Heimann, Jason, me and the boys, and Dan Perkins

I am proud of you Jason!  Thank you for letting us be a part of your special day!

Hey-Hey

A funny thing about Clark, that I don't want to forget...

Clark always used to say, 'yeah yeah'.

When he wanted a treat, when he was answering a question, when I was finally able to decode whatever mumble-jumble of words he was trying to get me to understand.  Sometimes he would get so excited about it, "Yeah Yeah Mahi, Yeah Yeah!" in his excited high pitched voice.

(For example)

Clark, do you want to take a bath?

"Yeah, yeah!"

Do you want a cookie? 

"Yeah, yeah!"

Oh, did you mean you wanted to go down the slide?

"YEAH YEAH!"

It was so cute, and it was one of my favorite things about him.

Now, he says "okay" in reply to everything, except it sounds like "hey-hey".

Clark, do you want to go outside?

"Hey-hey."

Would you like a bagel and cream cheese for breakfast? (His favorite.)

"HEY-HEY!"

Clark, do you love your cousin so much?

"Hey-hey."

I don't know what changed, he has only started saying it these past couple weeks.  I think it is so funny.

I do say 'okay' a lot, especially when I don't want to do something, so maybe he got it from me.

I love my Big Tuna!  As challenging as he can be sometimes (a lot of the time) he really is so loving and fun to be around.  

I don't know what I would ever do without him.

Super Why?

This is Clark's new favorite show.  

He asks me about 30 times a day if he can watch "Supa Hi".  He loves it, and I love it too, because it is teaching him so much stuff!  He likes to sing the ABC's everyday now, and find letters all over the place.  He can even recognize about half the alphabet.    It is fun to watch his tastes change and mature.  Before I know it we are going to be watch Superman, Batman, and then Lord of the Rings.

My Shirt!

Clark wanted to pick out his own clothes!

May 26, 2010

Blue robot pajama pants, and a green monster t-shirt.

He wore it all day, to the park even, and he was so proud of himself.

I love that he is becoming more independent, and wanting to help take care of himself more.

Dear Clark...

Dear Clark,

I am so happy you can talk now!  So very happy!  

I love hearing you try to say new words, and sentences. You are learning how to express your self very well, and everyday you say something new.  You even love to sing.  You walk around all day singing little songs, lately it has been Sponge-Bob's, Its The Best Day Ever song

 (you are so delightfully cute).  

So, again I LOVE that you can talk now, love it.  

However, if you could please refrain from talking back to me that would be just as great :)

Love,

Your Mahi

ps.  Last night as we were trying to round up the kids for bed, I warned Clark that he just had few minutes left, and then it was time to go to bed.  He said, while waving his hand at me to go away, "NO, a not a time a bed!"  It was the first time he ever talked back to me.  In fact it was the longest sentence I ever heard him say.  I was giggling so much I forgot to even get mad at him.

Iceland

Iceland by  Besty Tobin

★★★

A pretty good read, not great, but good.  This book was a last minute impulse buy, and I only grabbed it because Diana Gabaldon (one of my favorite authors) said it was "magic".  I wouldn't call it magic, but it was certainly entertaining.
Part fairy tale, part Icelandic history, the story follows several characters while they struggle to keep ahold of their heritage and culture in an ever changing world.  I found the characters interesting, and I was invested in the story, and the outcome...there was just something missing.

Dear FREE Wireless, I love you.

Well, we are all moved out of our house and on our family vacation!!  

Leaving Hawaii was beyond sad, so sad I am not even ready to go there yet (blogging wise).  

We spent 10 wonderful days hotel hopping in Waikiki (pics to come later), and after one long plane ride, and fun train ride we finally got to Utah.  Clark is loving spending time with his cousins, loving it.  And I am loving the free wireless, among other things :)  I got so behind on my pictures and blogging these past couple weeks, I am not sure I will ever recover.  But I am going to spend today trying (little Harry has the barfs, so we are taking a day of rest).  

It is so nice to be around family again!!!  

Way Back Wednesday, or My Travelin' Man

Way Back Wednesday this week, but only because I have forgotten the past couple Flashback Fridays ;)

Jason's weekend work trip to Wake Island.

Earlier this month Jason got called out on a last minute trip to Wake Island.  Occasionally, with his job, he will have to fly out on the big C130's to pick up people up who need medical attention.  Sometimes he only has to go to Kauai, or the Big Island, and other times he may have to go as far as Guam, Christmas Island or Midway.  Even though it is work, I don't think he minds getting away for a day or two, and visiting some pretty cool places.  I, on the other hand, am very jealous and wish I could sneak along with him.  I wish I could visit some of the places he has gone for "work" but I will just have to be satisfied enjoying his pictures.

Can you believe how HUGE these hermit crabs were!

Jay on a boat, getting ready to go pick up a wounded fisherman...or something.

This picture really doesn't have to do anything with this post, I just think he looks handsome :)

These pictures were taken when we lived in Alameda, California when he was station on the CG Cutter Sherman.  He was stationed on the boat for about 18 months, and they went on some pretty amazing trips, down the coast to South America, and up the coast to Alaska and the Bering Strait.

Jay and his friends/co-workers on the CG Cutter Sherman.

Getting ready for his horseback tour through the jungles in Costa Rica.

(Work???  I was/am so jealous...maybe I should join the Coast Guard.)

Some of the stops during their South American Tour was Ecaudor, Costa Rica, Cabo San Lucas, and Puertro Rico... just to name a few.  They were gone for such a long time, but they did some good work out there.

Jay and his friends/co-workers taking a much needed break from the rigors of boat life.  

I know it was hard being on the boat, for months at a time, away from family and the comforts of home, so I am glad they got to get out and take breaks every now and then, even if I am still a little envious.

I am so thankful for the Coast Guard in our life.  It provides for our family well, gives Jason great education and a job he loves (most days), and we have been able to meet some of our closest friends and make some unforgettable memories.

Waves

It comes in waves.  The melancholy, the sadness, the excitement, the joy, and the wonder of it all...
These past few weeks in the Bosko house have been an emotional roller coaster, to say the least.  It seems like it is one thing after another, it is nothing we can't handle, but still give a Mom a break.

We will be innocently driving down the street, singing abc's with Clark (or Poker Face, his new favorite song, don't ask why, he just loves it) and it will hit all of the sudden, bam! we are moving, all the way across the country.  No more driving down the coast for shave ice, no more beautiful weather all year around, no more snorkeling and holidays spent barbecuing on the beach.  We are leaving this place, this wonderful place where we started our family.  And then as quickly as it comes (the sadness) it leaves again, with a new found excitement for our next grand adventure.  Out of all the places Jason and I have lived, this feels the most like our home, and it is hard to imagine raising our family in any other place.  However, we know there is a reason (unbeknownst to us, right now) that we were sent to Virginia.  And then it hits us again, bam! we are moving, across the country, and we are all a twitter with plans and excitement.  We will be able to be closer to friends we haven't seen in years, and there are so many new and wonderful things the boys will get to experience.  Trading our sweet little Hawaiian life, for something new and different, is scary, bittersweet and exciting, all at the same time... right now though, its leaving me mostly tired.
Much like the waves of emotions that are coming with all the changes and moving, I am still reeling from Harry's recent diagnosis.  Life seems to go on like normal all around us, and for whole days I will forget that Harry is Autistic.  Then he will do something, something funny that maybe everyone else will laugh about, but I know it is one of his symptoms, and while everyone is laughing and saying how cute he is, I get sad and scared.  Sure it is funny now, when he is still a toddler, but is it still going to be funny when he is 10, 11, 13.  There are moments of disappointment when people don't treat him the same as the other kids in the room, and of confusion as I try to digest all the massive amounts of information being thrown my way, and gratitude for all the people that are helping my little Harry.  I struggle with the details; should I tell people, do they really need to know, and why should I hide it anyway-there is nothing really wrong with him, should I make excuses for him when he does things or explain it away... it is still so new.  With the sadness, and frustration, there is also hope.  Hope in the things I know he can do, and soon will do.  Joy in his laughter.  Success and relief in conquering all the little every day things, that build up so fast.  Hope for his future, and for the whole family.
From exciting promotions (yea Jay), to last minute changes with our move, to packing and planning, to the millions of appointments for Harry, and saying good bye to friends and our sweet little Hawaiian life, to chores galore (seriously, trying to stay up on house work right now is killing me), I don't know how we are keeping up.  Family vacation time is right around the corner!
There is JOY in the journey, right.  It may be sad and hard and stressful at times, but in the end it is worth it, and there is joy and my happy little family.  And as long as I got them, it is all good.